Reply to MIL Changing Plans to See Favorite Grandchild

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How is she “finding out” your son’s plans?

Loose lips sink ships. Don’t tell her anything unless you want to see her. And if your son actively wants to see her, that’s fine, but you don’t have to be around. Go on a spa weekend. He’s not a baby.[/quote]

Notice that OP won’t answer this question: How is she “finding out” your son’s plans?

If you told her, that’s on you.
If DH told her, that’s on him.

If YOUR SON told her, and he wants to see her, then THAT is what “rules the day.” It’s his time home and he should see the people he wants to see during the visit. If you don’t like that, take yourself out to the movies or get your nails done.[/quote]

I don't honestly remember. Most likely she asked, and we answered. It's hard to be evasive on direct questioning, [b]and my son would have told her if we hadn't.[/b]

Actually, it was my son's idea to have brunch with me, my husband and daughter.

He hasn't heard anything about grandma's plans - that communication is going through my husband. She hasn't reached out to my son.[/quote]

Well, there you have it. YOUR SON is choosing to have a close relationship with his grandma where he tells her his plans. So either YOUR SON can stop telling her every time he's in town, or he can make arrangements to see her or to host her. Do you get that? Do you get that if he informs you that Grandma will be coming over for brunch, you can say hey sounds fun, enjoy, and you can go get a pedicure or make a coffee date with a friend? You don't even need to be there. And if you want time with your son without Grandma around, you can open your mouth and communicate that to the son you raised.

This isn't on her. She is just expressing her wishes. This is on you and DH for informing her of your plans and your business, and on your son for informing her of his plans and his business. [/quote]

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