Reply to Why would someone choose not to confront a cheating spouse?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The guy probably knows there would be no point and he didn’t want to save the marriage anyway.  My Ex-H cheated with his admin assistant (so unique and special!) and I did confront him, but he lied about it and gaslit me for a solid year of therapy. I had trust issues. I wasn’t a good mom. I spent too much time in the office. I didn’t spend enough time in the office. He couldn’t be in a marriage where his spouse didn’t trust him.  I was an idiot for trusting him.  He literally drive me insane.

Looking back, I could have predicted that would be how he handled things. Wish I had just skipped that year and gone straight to divorce. [/quote]

+1.  My spouse responded to me telling him I knew he was cheating by begging me to stay in the relationship. (We had 2 kids.) I literally said to him that I was only willing to be in a monogamous relationship and that he had to go to therapy, truthfully disclose, etc. - and please don’t ask for this chance if you can’t do that, I don’t want to be 2 years down the road in the same position.

Guess what happened?

Really skipping it all - confrontation, couples therapy, etc. would have been better. [/quote]

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