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[quote=Anonymous]Like OP I wonder how I’ll feel too. I had a great childhood but things got tense when I was in college and grad school because I was trying to assert some independence and was probably being a huge a-hole. I’m in my 40s now and things have been going downhill since I got married because she hates DH and his entire family for reasons unimportant to this post.

She’s also become one of the most negative people I have ever encountered to the point where we can’t have a conversation without negative rants about everything. And I do mean “rant.”  Lengthy monologues about how everything  is awful, everything is dangerous, everyone has malicious intent, DH is terrible, everything I do is wrong, and the usual politics.  It’s hard to get in a word and she just gets louder.

It’s exhausting and I can’t have a conversation with her. I don’t call her on the phone just to talk. She lives nearby so I usually see her once a week with DC but she doesn’t like my house so she always leaves after about 30 min.  She won’t stay for dinner because she doesn’t like my food. I try to bring up positive aspects about what we are discussing or redirect her but nothing works. I avoid spending time alone with her because of the extreme negativity and ranting. She is sad about this. She blames DH and I’ve tried to explain that it’s because I don’t want to be ranted at constantly but she thinks that we are just having a normal conversation.

She is in her 80s now and I feel obligated to try and repair the relationship but I don’t know how. Do I spend time alone with her and just absorb all the negativity?  When she dies how will I feel? I think I’m going to feel incredibly guilty for distancing myself. [/quote]

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