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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. My question isn’t so much about making friends (although I hope for that, too, of course!), but I’d love for him to try things of interest or possible
interest like for random examples- model UN club, intramural softball, campus radio station, volunteer tutoring, etc. I’m not trying to remake him, but am a believer that you get more out of life being part of a community than an island. He also needs to start exploring interests to spark potential careers/fields of
study. Hopefully someone will respond with campus environments that inspired their kids to try something new or get out of their shell a little. [/quote]

Not to be argumentative, but if you can't get him to do those things while he's a kid living in your house, how would a college get him to do them?

I hope all our kids come out of their shells more in college, but I think the drive probably has to come with age or maturity or greater confidence from within.[/quote]

This is kind of what I was thinking. I have a somewhat similar sounding kid, BUT he does activities because it’s been made clear to him since elementary school that he has to and he has found a number that he likes. He’s a 10th grader now and I’m sure I’m helicoptering the college process, but I think “fit” is going to be tricky for him. Here is what I’m looking for and hope he’ll agree with if I steer him this way:

1) little or no Greek life, he’s not a partier at all
2) small to medium - I want him to see the same people frequently and not just get lost in a crowd, not have a hard time getting spots in clubs, and have smaller classes where he is essentially forced to get to know professors. 
3) on campus housing available at least three years
4) very interested in colleges with the house system for freshman
5) he’s not quirky really, but places that are welcoming for nerdier quiet kids 
6) academically rigorous because I think he’ll be more likely to find his people

If you have a good relationship I think you really need to push the idea of getting involved now and in college with clubs and activities, whether outside school or in school. [/quote]

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