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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So if there is mutual attraction then it's better to stay FAR away from eachother?? Can an attraction be put aside, so the friendship can be kept?[/quote]

I am friends with men I've had serious relationships with in the past. I'm also friends with men who I am extremely attracted to. Some of those attractive men are also attracted to me. I do not believe that this in and of itself indicates that my marriage is on the rocks or any of the other things that many PPs would say. You have to WANT to be a cheater. You have to be missing something in your marriage. I have no interest in cheating on my husband with one of my attractive male friends and therefore, I'm not going to.

I think that if I found out that one of my male friends wanted to initiate an affair, I would no longer be able to be friends with him - not because of the tension, but because it would then be clear to me that he did not respect me, my values, my decision making or my relationship. That is not the kind of person I'd want to be friends with anyway, and I think there's a big difference between that scenario and thinking someone of the opposite sex that you are friends with is sexy. I think Colin Firth is sexy but I'm as likely to have an affair with him as I am with any of the men I'm friends with who I also think are sexy.

If both people are confident in their relationship status (single, coupled, gay, straight, whatever), then it doesn't really matter what gender they are or how attractive they find each other. Like I said, you have to WANT to be a cheater.[/quote]

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