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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes I apologize. I do it a lot, but I’m specific. I’ll apologize for raising my voice or being dismissive, but that doesn’t mean I let my kid off the hook if they did fonething that led to me losing my cool. But yes, I apologize for inappropriate behavior that doesn’t meet our family’s standards of respect and kindness.

This is one of those things where you can’t just think about yourself, you have to think about what you are modeling for your kid. Not only do I want my children to be able to apologize when they mess up, but I also want them to expect that future friends, partners, colleagues, etc., should treat them respectfully. Apologizing to someone is a way of acknowledging that they are worthy of respect. I want my kids to feel worthy. That by itself is worth apologizing to them.[/quote]

Great post.  100% agree.[/quote]

Said better than I could.  I want mine to know strength in apologizing and when (and how) to stand ground.[/quote]

I have the same approach -- apologies for specific instances of behavior that doesn't meet the standards for how our family should treat each other, especially if it's behavior that my kids would get in trouble for.  An example: "I'm sorry I yelled at you for not cleaning your room.  I was angry because I asked you many times and you didn't do it.  But being angry doesn't mean it's okay for me to yell.  We tell you it's not okay to yell at us when you're mad, and we shouldn't yell at you, either.  I should have taken some deep breaths to calm down before I spoke to you.  I will try harder to control my temper.  Now, please clean your room."   It's a way of reinforcing that there isn't a double standard for appropriate behavior for kids and adults, and that they are just as worthy of respectful treatment as I am.  [/quote]

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