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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m dating someone now that I feel utterly comfortable with, who shares my sense of humor, who supports me in a way I have never been supported…but I don’t find him exceptionally inspirational. We laugh all the time, we can talk about anything, the sex is amazing, and I think he is adorable. [b]Should I be concerned that there is no sense of deep admiration for his intellect, his curiosity, or his drive? [/b]He is a person that makes me feel deeply happy and myself. I’m a confused person, clearly. Thoughts? What attributes have others in successful long term relationships found to be most important?[/quote]

That’s a question that you have to ask yourself.  Do you have those qualities yourself, if so, are you looking for someone to be the same so you can enjoy those things with them, looking for someone to be supportive or looking for someone to be a balance in those areas?  I’m a curious, practical person that likes stability after a chaotic childhood.  I don’t know that an intellectual partner that wants to talk theory with me would be a good match.  Nor would a driven, ambitious risk taker be a good match. Now my curiosity is an important part of who I am and it is important for someone to either be similarly curious or at a minimum not damper that aspect of my personality.  It’s really the cliche that it doesn’t have to be the perfect person, but the perfect person for you.  Who are you, and what fits who you are and what you need.[/quote]

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