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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Being “inspired” by my partner sounds exhausting. I’m entertained, supported, amused, turned on, interested, etc. etc. by him. But I’d hate to live with someone I was in awe of. [/quote]

Agree to all of the above!

I'm inspired by his kindness, his generosity of spirit and his compassion. I'm not interested in being inspired by intellect. My DH is smart as hell and I'm impressed on the daily but he isn't a figure to look up to for me b.c we are equals.

I chose the emotional supportive guy. Your first marriage didn't work out. Maybe it's time for a change[/quote]

+2.  I would also say of my close friends, everyone has something that drew me to being friends but it’s not all the same thing and it’s not necessarily what I would look for in a romantic partner.  One friend, I admire her directness, she is one of the two people I can go to when I need advice and am in a space that I can handle if it isn’t what I want to hear.  With another friend, I like that she is structured but laid back - she has given me another perspective on certain situations with the kids. With someone else we have similar family background including a parent that is a hoarder - we can talk about it and not feel judged or shamed in a way that it’s difficult to have with other people.  My friends are all smart and have a sense of humor - but not all the same type.

For spouse, I would also say his thoughtfulness is something that stood out.  We’ve been together over 20 years and I would say we are now good friends, but it took spending time and being together to really get there and my DH wanting to hear about and talk about things.  I’m not a believer in soul mates/one person destined to be with, however I can say after all this time, I can’t imagine anyone else that would fit me so well - same on the important things - values and sense of humor, different enough to balance each other without wanting to change the person.[/quote]

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