Reply to It's really hard for me to feel sorry for people who were last of their classmates to turn 21:

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Reply to "It's really hard for me to feel sorry for people who were last of their classmates to turn 21:"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People with fall birthdays are usually the ones who have this experience as they usually turn 18 their freshman year and 21 their senior year. [/quote]
OP what school district are you coming from?  When I was growing up in the DMV and the cutoff dates were Jan 1, this was the case.  I had one of those fall birthdays and I went to college at age 17.  But now, most school districts use Sept 1 so what you're describing doesn't happen much.

[b]I think you're conflating people's light conversation about bar-hopping and your reflections on the straight vs. crooked path.[/b]  Some people take a gap year, which is very different from dropping out from college due to anxiety.  Others go to the military, and don't even enter college until they are 21.  If your friend's son is unhappy that he can't go to bars, maybe it's simply that the son feels left out.  You of all people should have some empathy for a person who feels left out.  Also, some people just need to vent.  It's not always about victimization.  They are just letting off steam.  [b]You don't need to take them too seriously, or argue with them, or get too upset about what they say.[/b]  [/quote]

The only person who can choose how to feel about flippant comments around turning 21 is you.  You asked your family friend how their son was and they responded with his experience.  That has nothing to do with you and it would have been self centered of you to ask the question you considered so it's good you were able to stop yourself.  I would encourage you to find a place where you can allow others to expressing their feelings or experience and not hear it as commentary or comparison point on your experience because this is a slippery slope of a game to play. As a previous poster stated, there are all sorts of challenges in life from mere inconveniences, to hurdles, to trauma - and playing the - don't complain about X because it could have been Y game (within reason because of course there are people who complain too much and people who are truly insensitive about the experiences of others) is problematic. [/quote]

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