Reply to If You Quit To Be A SAHM

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "If You Quit To Be A SAHM"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I quit a couple months after returning from my maternity leave because our childcare situation was a massive stress and work was not being accommodating of it, or of me needing to pump at work. I contemplated staying and fighting the situation through HR, but I was a new mom and just sick of it and wanted to just be home with my baby and not dealing with the BS at work. It was tight for our family money wise, but we knew it would solve several other issues including the fact that I hated my job, so I quit.

But I always kept a toe in by doing freelance work. I think unless you are certain you never want to return to your previous industry/career, you have to do something like this. Even if it's volunteering at a conference once a year or something. Just anything that keeps you connected to former colleagues and forces you to stay current on developments in the field. Even with my freelance work, it was challenging when I decided I wanted to go back because it took me over a year to feel like I was back to a comfortable hold on the industry and wasn't playing catch up. If I'd stayed out entirely, I think that obstacle might have been too daunting to overcome.

There are some confidence issues that come up when you return. You are older and feel like a different person -- in many ways you are because motherhood alters your values system and personality somewhat (it is not anti-feminist to say this, it's just the truth that motherhood changes you). It feels a bit like entering the workforce for the first time again, only the expectations are so much higher because of you age and level. Most people will not cut you slack the way they would a new college grad. Plus you do still have kids, and have to balance that, and the whole thing can feel a bit like walking a tightrope.

But keeping up freelance work during the years I was out helped a ton. I had friends and colleagues I could call and ask questions if I needed to, I was able to reference freelance projects I'd done when approaching to work projects and offer useful insight based on recent experience, even though I hadn't been full time in the industry for many years. It just helped me feel like I belonged and like I could do it. Plus, doing freelance work while being a full time SAHM with minimal childcare for many years made working a full-time job with full-time childcare feel like an incredible luxury. If you've written reports in the 2.5 hour window that your oldest is in preschool while your youngest takes the morning nap (the whole time praying nothing goes wrong with either kid), then having an 8 hour work day with no kids at all feels like an amazing luxury. I'm so productive and efficient!

My recommendation is to maintain a connection to your work life, even if it is just minor and occasional. It really makes a difference later.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics