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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do you have kids?  Are you single, divorced, remarried, do you have stepkids?

Above all, do not overestimate your stepchildren's willingness to care for you after your partner is gone, especially if you joined the family when they were teens or adults.  They have their own families and their other parent to think of.  Your needs will be one among many.[/quote]

We are married and have two young adult DCs.  One lives on the other coast and the other attends college out of state.  No stepchildren.[/quote]

I would not make any plans based on young adult DCs. Or for that matter even older DCs.  People's lives can change drastically and it is much, much harder for older adults to pack up and move, or be left behind, in a place where their kids are no longer.  It can be financially devastating, too.

Like any other stage of life, you have to plan this one for yourselves - what is best for you and will allow you to live in an environment where you are happy and as socially and physically active as possible.

Adult children are living their own lives and parents need to be practical.  Whether you and your children are close or not, I think most parents/people would say they don't want to be a burden to anyone. For that reason, find a geographic location where there are options for rehabilitative care, long term care, etc. should you need it. Agree that having a decent sized airport nearby is best, when kids want to visit.

My cousins insisted on my aunt moving out to their home when she started to get a little frail but was otherwise in good shape. She was absolutely miserable and it was a horrible decision to move her from her home city to a place where she knew no one (but family, who were all busy with work, school), she couldn't get around because she couldn't drive, and she had no friends.  The family also realized that they were suffering horrible guilt because grandma was stuck in the house all day and away from everything that brought her joy.

Within a year, she moved back home and into an assisted living facility. She was so much happier and lived her final days there. [/quote]

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