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Reply to "I'm a 53 year old woman and I just found out my Dad (died 6 year ago) was gay"
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[quote=Anonymous]OP you did know and love all of him. I know it feels in some ways like you didn't know him but this really is a detail in his life. It would be one thing if he had a hidden life- like he was an artist/painter or had another family... but really- it's his sex life. No one wants to share and care about their parent's sex life. Just use your time to process it and ask more questions/learn more about your living parent if she feels like sharing and if you really want to know more. She is the more interesting person in this. How did she cope? How did she process? Does she feel angry/sad/etc? What got her through when she learned, etc. People are gay and hide it all the time-there isn't really anything new on his side- but you have an opportunity to learn more about your Mum- it isn't as common for spouses to be able to convincingly play along until death.[/quote]
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