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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it would be weird to watch another couple raise "your" kids.  What if you didn't agree with their parenting?  What if the kid had a lot of tragedy?  It's got to be so much harder to watch knowing that is really your child.  Imagine your baby if she chooses "cry it out" or spanking when you don't support those things..... and on and on.  It has to muddy boundaries.  What if the child comes to you later and wants birth control or an abortion, do you help them avoid telling their birth parents?

I understand you DH's feelings.[/quote]

This is exactly why I don’t want to donate.

-NP[/quote]

This makes sense when you're donating full embryos to close family. A non-local friend (a plane ride away) offered us her leftover embryos because they didn't want to discard them, but that would have been an extended aunt/uncle type relationship at best. Not close enough for the donating family to see the daily parenting and struggles of the resulting child. However, it could also be the only way for your brother's family to have a genetically related child. I think it's a tough decision and absolutely nobody should pressure your DH or anyone, but if it were me I'd probably hang onto them until your brother's family was done with fertility treatments. The moving goalposts are real and nobody really knows how they'd decide these questions until they actually come up. Giving it more time doesn't hurt anything.[/quote]

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