Reply to 6 months post-affair and still struggling

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, what expensive tastes does your husband have? I ask because there are tastes that take him away from the family, and there are tastes that don't. Does he say want a car that the kids can't ride in? Or does he want a camper or a beach house, something that you all or at least he and the kids could enjoy? You mention that he is involved and a good dad. That's priceless. It also sounds like you might be working too hard at the mom thing. Private schools, if it stresses you that much, use public.  Speech therapy, speak well around the kids, they will get it figured out. Have them listen to shows where people speak in full sentences with correct grammar and correct behavior as in not interupting one another, things like that.  The sitter, while you probably do have more experience then hubby, so what? He is a parent too.  Sounds like you may be invalidating him due to his lack of experience.  I'm an engineer and used that skill set with my husband when we discussed whether or not a home repair was needed. He felt it wasn't, I felt it was. I listened to him, then explained what would happen if we followed his plan and we decided that the repair was worth doing right because it would save us $$$ down the road.  It isn't your husband's fault he has different training and skills then you do.  As for the dog, sounds like you don't want him around. Still your husband is taking care of him. So your therapist is right. He's also right on a personal level, we all like t obe thanked and appreciated. As for staying up with a sick kid, most men suck at that. Does he help in other ways, getting up in the morning so you can sleep, making you a meal you like to show (get this) his appreciation? Does he hang out with the kids so you can recharge with a glass of wine and a book. And truthfully there's no point in him being up with a sick kid if he can't meet that child's needs with tenderness and love. Better to have him take the daytime shift.  [/quote]

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