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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I can tell you why I did. Really shitty examples growing up. It took FOREVER to unlearn. Seriously, some of the hardest work I've ever done. I could write a book about the effects of crap dads and the fallacy of "staying together for the kids." [/quote]

My Dad wasn't crap. But they had a horrible marriage and he was gone a lot for work. So I'd fall for guys that were emotionally or physically distance. And as long as they were nice some of the time, I put up with it. And figured I just had to try harder. I mean my blueprint for what marriage is was so bad. Lots of repeating what my parents did-- Mom overly invested with really unrealistic expectation of romance and who my Dad really was, Dad emotionally and physically distant. So I would pursue and they would distance, and I called it LOVE. And fights were just part of what people in love did. Plus the saying that relationship are hard work. I couldn't differentiate between putting in effort to a good relationship and beating a dead horse of a bad relationship.

My advice--if you are going to stay together for the kids, find a way to have a good working relationship or just get a divorce. Just staying married for the sake of staying married doesn't prevent the kids from being damaged. [/quote]

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