Reply to What would you say if a relative asked if you're upset not to have daughters?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am a little sad about not having a girl but at the same time my brother is closer to my mom than I am and he does much more than me to take care of her now that she is old and a widow. When my dad died everyone asked me if I was moving my mom to be near me and I just said "no she lives near my brother." [b]People make a lot of assumptions about gender but they don't have to be true.[/b][b]

One thing I do worry about is whether I'll be less close to my grandchildren (if I have any) because I'll be the MIL. I read some study about how kids tend to be closer to their maternal grandparents. But even that isn't always true (and isn't true in the case of my family).

That said, it sucks that your MIL is saying this stuff to you!!! My SIL does the same thing. She always goes on telling me and my boys (!!!) how she was so nervous while pregnant with her second kid because she desperately wanted a girl and she didn't know what she would have done if she had had two boys. I want to say "STFU" but instead I just say "I was so excited that have two boys."[/quote]

Absolutely, but they often are true.[/quote]

If you do a good job raising your sons and lead by example (marry someone who has a good relationship with his mom, don't be the gatekeeper wife who keeps your MIL away) they are less likely to be true. Also, remember that you are an N of 1. Statistics are meaningful for society but not really for individuals. Your kids either will be close to you  as adults or they won't. Plus I honestly have not seen any patterns of women I know being closer to their parents as adults than men.

But regardless OP is not asking if she is worse off for having boys. She is asked ng about dealing with an obnoxious MIL.[/quote]

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