Reply to "But WHY should I stop playing video games so much?"

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Reply to ""But WHY should I stop playing video games so much?""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have never limited screen time because I feel if we forbid something, it's always what they want.

I have 2 boys, ages 16 and 18. My rules have always been

get As and Bs (both have that ability and are good students)

exercise every day

go outside every day

family dinner/movies/outings are without screens

do your chores'

and if you do that, you can do whatever you want with the rest of your day.

And I never bug them or try to get them off their video games--- I just kind of give them the impression it is lame.

My 18 year old rarely plays video games - maybe never, he does watch a lot of netflix and texts his friends

My 16 year old plays A LOT of video games, but he still does the required things and even he gets tired of it sometimes and turns it off - probably because he knows he can play again whenever.  We treat it like no big deal.

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This is what we do as well.  My older one does play video games but not as much as the younger one.  They both find it their social outlet during this time of COVID.  The two kids also game together alot so that helps with sibling bonding.  Plus, they do limit themselves, and we do give them opportunities (watch a movie with the family, play games, go for a walk/hike) to be offline with us.  We have had several conversations about balance that they seem to have internalized.  Both get good grades and take school seriously, and both have an outside sport that they still participate in at least 2-3x a week.  They also migrate towards the family room in the late evening where we all hang out.  Even if we aren't having a lively discussion, we are still together.[/quote]

I've tried to emulate this and found it doesn't work for us really well because my 14yo son has no activities/hobbies other than reading AND this is how he connects w/ friends from the city we moved from (he hasn't made friends here yet).  So during COVID weekends when we're doing very little he could be playing video games all day.  During the week, he needs to get outside/exercise 30m (usually walking dog), do HW, do some simple chores, and feed the dog and then he can have an hour of video games.  We've 'forced' him to do a sport because he's getting so little exercise on his own and we're hoping he'll fall in love w it.  During the weekend it's harder when we don't have plans.  Even if we go for a hike there's the rest of the day when he wants to be on the screen.  So we had to limit it again to 2 hours in the am and then put away the phone, stop playing games, and do something else until after dinner when he can have a few hours. That's still like 6 hours/day!  It is really, really hard but I do think you need to put limits until they learn how to.  Good luck.

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