Reply to First year of baby's life: visiting grandparents?

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Reply to "First year of baby's life: visiting grandparents?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it doesn't sound like you actually were treating your in-laws like babysitters (nursing upstairs does not make you a bad host, I would say from your FIL's point-of-view that probably made you a good host).  I think the PP's were just trying to give you different perspectives to think about.

I will give you another one.  We live about three hours from my BIL and SIL and they have a one year old. We have no kids.  We have gone up to visit them three times this year for baby related things (birth, baptism, 1st birthday.)  And, we have gone to IL's house who live near them (so also about three hours for us) three other times for family events.  For us, six trips out of town.  BIL and SIL haven't visited us this year, which is fine.  But, they are starting to play the "we have a kid and it is a pain to travel card" a lot for family events and expecting everyone to work around their needs.  Yes, it easier for us to travel (which is why we have done it this year and not asked them to do it) but, we also have our own schedules and don't think that our lives are unimportant just because we don't have kids.

So, my advice.  Make sure you aren't giving off a "our lives are so hard and yours is so easy so, of course, you should always be the one who is inconvenienced" vibe.  If you have never been to see them, you might be guilty of this.  You can take a hard line on no traveling with a kid, but you risk giving up the moral high ground by going this route. [/quote]

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