Reply to MIL problem (AGAIN!).... re. nursing home/decision making...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to look into getting a power of attorney (both financial and medical), if MIL is in fact becoming unable to manage her affairs. [/quote]

My husband already has a POA (signed in 2003) and she also has a living will in place. However, correct me if I am wrong, the POA does not give him powers to make decision for her against her wishes, when she is still able to express her will (even if not completely sane/reasonable). I mean, if she was completely demented/out of it or in some sort of vegetative state, I can see how a POA would be useful.

Right now, it is only useful to monitor her accounts and make sure "no one" steals from her and to pay her bills in her name. I thought in a case like the one we have right now, the only thing that would really help would be some sort of guardianship.

I've read the POA and it says it can be revoked by her  (or a court)... so, can you imagine if my husband tell her "no, mom,  we won't let you go... we want you to stay here with us..." and she gets pissed and revoke the POA?! Then I would be much more concerned about this friend of hers and his influence on her....

It is clear we have to reach for the Assisted living manager - I only hope she is used to this kind of situation and can guide us, put us in contact with a social worker or whatnot.

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