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[quote=Anonymous]I had extremely high anxiety. I had been through 4 IVFs and a miscarriage at this point. The months leading up to this embryo transfer were full of physical health setbacks including a breast cancer scare. And then I had random bleeding episodes three times in the first trimester.

Until I started feeling the baby kick regularly, I was regularly convinced the baby had died and I'd find out at the next appointment. Once the baby did kick regularly, I'd freak out if it was quieter than I hoped on a given day. I was AMA (41) and the way AMA pregnancy is treated by doctors only made it worse for me.

I did have a shower, but as I went to put the gifts away, I remember thinking I should save the boxes in case the baby didn't make it and I needed to return everything.

The best day of my pregnancy was checking in for my induction because I knew the baby would be continuously monitored from that point forward. It wasn't until she was in my arms that I actually believed I'd be leaving the hospital with a baby.

She was born perfectly healthy after an easy labor and it turns out I am the most laidback parent. I think I am just so relieved and grateful every day that she's here, that I don't sweat the small stuff. She is a happy, chatty toddler who has hit all of the milestones. She's perfect.

I would suggest that any moment of happiness you have in this pregnancy - a good ultrasound, some kicks, people sending gifts and cards - you try to burn into your brain and enjoy the moment before spiraling into worry. Someday you will be able to look back and mostly remember those.[/quote]

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