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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, your DH is a combination of people pleaser and very low self esteem.

I've known people like him. I had a friend who didn't want to seem cheap and was very caught up in giving the appearance of being comfortable even though she was very poor. She went into debt just to avoid issues that she thought might offend people. In reality, it would have been perfectly fine t say sorry, that's not in the budget for me right now, but that's something she would NEVER say. She had a history of severe abuse as a child. I hope that's not the case with your husband, but either way he needs professional help now.

Don't have kids with him. He cares more about what strangers think of him than doing what's right by you and any future kids. He's weak and this is unlikely to get much better. I'm trying to be as gentle as I can, but his behavior is a function of severe issues that go very deep and would make him a horrible father and partner. I'm sorry and I hope I'm wrong.[/quote]

Me again. OP, I should have said that you should seek therapy as well. It sounds like you're starting to see the pattern and are struggling with how to define it. I mean this kindly, but you don't just accidentally marry someone as insecure and flawed as he is. Get yourself therapy so you can heal and have the happy future that you deserve. You sound like a decent person. [/quote]

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