Reply to Estranged Sibling entered rehab for alcoholism and wants to talk

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. How do you handle a situation where the person sort of apologizes but then says they blacked out so don’t remember the bad behavior? Do you bring up specifics? [/quote]

You say "Well I do remember.  As a result XYZ happened or I still feel . . .

Your comments about his behavior will help him continue to process the effects of his addiction and move forward in his recovery including making any amends[/quote]

That's how I handled it for what its worth. My mother got black out drunk and then tried to kill herself while I was home for the holidays. In the meantime she penned notes and left them all over the house blaming me for all of her problems and telling me what a horrible daughter I am. The next day, while in the ER with my dad after we found her, I conferred with the doctors, had her involuntarily hospitalized for three days, and stayed in town to help my dad through it all. Skip ahead, she emailed me that I was "really hurting [my] dad by not forgiving her" and I was just being selfish. So I sent her an email detailing every single thing she wrote, said and did over that 24 hour period, none of which she remembered. IF - and it was a big if - I was going to forgive her, it was part of my process that I wanted her to know what I was forgiving. [/quote]

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