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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I learned that my parents were bad at communicating with me and my siblings as kids. They didn’t talk to us about what was going on in our lives very much at all, didn’t ask us about school, didn’t help us research colleges or figure out what we wanted to do after high school, never talked to us about relationships or had “the talk” about changing bodies/puberty/periods/sex. They just expected us to figure things out for ourselves and gave basically no advice or guidance. I really never contemplated this before. In fact I think when I was a teenager, I was grateful they were so distant bc I didn’t have to have uncomfortable conversations with them but now that I’m a parent, I think their reluctance to talk to us about these things or offer advice was a big mistake and made my young adult life a lot more difficult to navigate than it would have been if I had parents who guided me more. I’m trying to not go too far to the other extreme with my kids (I don’t want to be overbearing or intrusive) but I do want them to feel that they have been adequately supported and counseled through their childhood, particularly the middle-high school and college years.[/quote]

My parents were all of this and more- never spoke to us or each other, self-centered, no life lessons or conversations ever, never signed us up for any sports or music, never went in real vacations or trips. And later we basically ignored my father in our teens since when he would talk it’d be nonsense.
One of my brothers never launched, the other was diagnosed with high functioning autism after having kids.  It was eye opening and exactly what we suspect both of our parents have.  Definitely dad but after 40 years of living with him, now it seems mom as well. Not an excuse as we all suffered and continue to, but now I’m scared for my kids to inherit it.[/quote]

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