Reply to Almost two year old not listening

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yup. It's a phase. Power throguh and be nice. Do consequences. Major  tantrum means you don't get to go to a fun place. Which sucks for everyone. [/quote]

Sucks the worst for the 2-yo who cannot understand “consequences” like this. Read about sequential brain development.  Quit setting yourself up for frustration.  Just pick up the toddler and go.  Sing a song if it helps.  Your adult brain can do this.  A 2-yo brain cannot. [/quote]

Yep, it’s all in how you frame it. They are not melting down to test you, or to be mean, or to manipulate you. They are melting down because they are experiencing an uncomfortable feeling like disappointment or frustration, and they have limited skills for dealing with it. Your job is to model these skills and to be a calm and supportive guide.

If I set ultimatums (“we are leaving the playground now or no treat after dinner”) it will generally make the meltdown worse, not better, because it will heighten the feeling she’s having. Often my toddler just needs to feel like she has some choice in the matter (“We are leaving the playground, do you want to walk or ride in the stroller?”) or have something else to focus on that isn’t the end of something (we struggle with bedtime, so we talk about how sleep can be fun because you can go anywhere or do anything in your dreams). [/quote]

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