Reply to Does my kid need an evaluation or do I need a parenting coach?

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Reply to "Does my kid need an evaluation or do I need a parenting coach?"

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[quote=Anonymous]
He needs more exercise and an earlier dinner and bedtime.

Start with that first.

Then implement a stricter policy for hitting and tantruming. You both need to be severe and consistent. You grab and squeeze him (he needs to feel the command physically, because verbal doesn't work at that age), look into his eyes, lower your voice, take the firmest tone you can, and say: "STOP". "DO NOT HIT". Then tell him to breathe. Practice breathing exercises (Mind Yeti is an excellent self-control online exercise for young children, my daughter's teacher used it every day). Make up an on-the-spot punishment that's quick but annoying for him. And when he's calm, repeat that he must never hit anyone otherwise he's doing to keep getting into trouble. You can distract him with silly conversation if he takes a bit of time to come to his senses, but always end with his acknowledgement that he's done something wrong.

If you feel he's too far gone to calm down in the moment, by all means, shut him up in his room, but understand that this will not teach him to self-regulate, it's just the last line of defense if you've got other urgent stuff to do.

Oh yes, and no screens in the late afternoon/evening. That gets them all riled up. Get a mini trampoline instead and put on music instead. [/quote]

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