Reply to Does my kid need an evaluation or do I need a parenting coach?

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Reply to "Does my kid need an evaluation or do I need a parenting coach?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That sounds tough. I think an eval AND a parenting coach in order-not because you are causing the issues but because kids with intense temperaments (and perhaps adhd, etc) can be really challenging and there is good evidence that specific parenting techniques can make a big difference. Id probably wait on a parenting classes/coaching till after an evaluation though so you have a better idea what of the nature of the issues. Good luck! [/quote]

not a parenting coach. an actual trained behavioral psychologist who knows evidence-based methods to address disruptive behavior.

start out with reading Kazdin, Parenting the Defiant Child.  https://alankazdin.com/

you can also seek out an evaluation, but evaluations a) take a long time and b) don't provide you any actual therapy, or even much insight into therapy.  our aggressive DS actually did get an autism diagnosis in the middle of trying to figure out his behavioral issue, but the autism diagnosis was literally useless.  it was one day with a psychologist who we never saw again.  all she said was "get behavioral therapy for aggression and work on social skills."  gee thanks!

if they wait for an evaluation, it will be another six months of letting these dysfunctional patterns escalate, and could get much, much worse.  ask me how I know.  especially with a smaller sib in the house, the aggression needs to be dealt with ASAP.

here's a starting place for therapy:  http://www.pcit.org/

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Also, I just wanted to address the notion that there's nothing that can be done until "you have a better idea of the nature of the issues." That's the single most harmful attitude we encountered when we started to deal with my DS's disruptive behaviors.  OP already KNOWS the nature of the issues -  her son is disruptive and physically aggressive, and she and her DH do not have parenting tools to deal with it.  Sure there could be an underlying diagnosis, but that has nothing at all to do with the actual challenge, which is obvious.  [/quote]

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