Reply to SIL emailed me asking me to apologize for bringing my own picnic food to her home

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]While you might have been fine to bring your own food, I will say that if I invited someone over to be my guest at a meal, spent time preparing something nice for them and figuring out to manage a socially distanced serving, and then found out that they never intended to eat it?  I'd be annoyed.

Why didn't you clarify this?  It is uncommon to bring your own food to someone else's event, so I don't know why you didn't ask them.

I would apologize for not letting her know. [/quote]

This.  It seems really weird to accept an invitation and then bring all your own stuff.  Your SIL didn't say "pot luck" in her invitation so you definitely should have asked before bringing a bunch of stuff for your own consumption (not even sharing!).  Sure your SIL shouldn't have sent the email but seems like you started it OP.  You owe her the much bigger apology imo.[/quote]

Nope in times of covid the OP is 100% in the right here[/quote]

I'm the top PP here, and I'm as covid paranoid as you can get.  We probably wouldn't have gone in the OP's circumstances, but if I did go, I would want to clarify whether or not I was going to eat the food.  I can't imagine going to someone's house for a meal they've prepared for me, and not tasting a thing, when I could have avoided it by simply saying "We'd love to come.  Our preference in the time of COVID is to bring our own food".  Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

My guess is that OP's SIL expressed surprise, and that rather than realizing she had been rude and apologizing "Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry, I misunderstood, and here you've gone to all that trouble. Your food looks delicious, but we've made the decision to always bring our own so I'm afraid I can't eat your delicious food.  Please accept my apology."  She instead implied that there was something wrong with the host for not reading her mind and anticipating that she'd bring her own.  [/quote]

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