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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you'll have some appeal across all of these groups, but you should be really realistic about what you are looking for and transparent about that with anyone you date. It is more for targetting your preferred demographic and type than anything else. For example, do you want more kids? If no, maybe look for women who have kids as well. They can probably relate to your situation. Are you open to having another 2+ kids? Then you are looking at a different pool. Sounds like you're not necessarily looking for a 24 year old who wants shopping vacations every other month, what do you think looks compatible for you? If that's someone in their 30s, just be clear with the kid thing. I think that's the #1 thing you need to figure out that would determine things like your age brackets and profession and education types. I can see you being attractive, for example, to a never married or divorced pretty 34 year old with no kids, but if you're done? Could be a huge dealbreaker. Figure out the kid thing basically and you're good.

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This is good advice. My BFF is about to marry a guy like you (late 40s, previously married, very well off financially but supporting his ex wife and two young kids) whom she met when she was 35 and he was 45. He was very clear that he did not want more kids, which she was totally fine with because she has never wanted them herself. That said, I think [b]being a stepmom has been a huge adjustment for her that she didn't expect, not to mention dealing with the dynamics of an ex-wife in the picture for the rest of their lives.[/b] [/quote]

This is why women should think very carefully before getting involved with a man who already has children. Should you get serious, the ex wife will be in your life for the rest of your life. Young kids with smallish problems become older adults often with even bigger problems. (Think divorced adult kid w/grandkids who needs serious financial support.)

To OP - the fact of the matter is your ex wife and kids may be a deal breaker if you want to get steady/serious with anyone. Most women who have careers and who do not have kids will have to sacrifice quite a bit due to your situation. For example, your kid begs you to come to a big soccer match on the same day as your girlfriend's milestone birthday - what do you do?  Your ex wife tells you the kids don't like your girlfriend and they will not be coming over anymore if she is there. What do you do?   You have limited vacation time from your BigLaw firm and kids want to go to Disney with you - GF was hoping for a romantic getaway.  What do you do?[/quote]

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