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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I wouldn’t go back unless my DH was really on board.  I’m not interested in working a second shift.  [/b][/quote]

This is essential.[/quote]

Agreed, and you have to really talk about what it means. My DH is always "on board" when I talk about returning to work, but it is hard to get him to commit to taking on specific responsibilities at home. We have had to really talk through each step of it as I've started part-time. Like he has a tendency to say "Just let me know when you need me to do something and I will!" But what I actually need is for him to take on a whole responsibility, not for me to have to keep track of everything and then make a special request when I "need help."

It's been challenging, but we are getting there. The thing is, I don't think this is about him trying to sabotage my return to work at all -- I genuinely think he supports me in that and wants me to be happy and likes having two incomes. Instead, I think it's just run of the mill laziness and him not wanting to commit to, say, being on dinner duty three nights a week because there will days when he really doesn't want to do it. But we talk a lot about keeping our expectations low for each other (dinner duty can be grilled cheese, it can be a frozen pizza, everyone has days when they just can't, there's no judgment) and keep communicating so no one starts feeling resentful or like the other person isn't doing their fair share.[/quote]

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