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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]“Doing all the mundane things together” IS a part of long-term relationships and marriage - that thought isn’t unique to your ex-BF.  I don’t know, maybe you just haven’t met the right guy. But it’s unclear what you’re looking for — it sounds like you want exclusivity and monogamy without intertwining lives?  But “hook-up guy” wasn’t able to offer you even that.

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Is it though? Why is that? Why can’t I have a LT partner who keeps their own house, finances, etc and I keep mine? Why do I need to see someone everyday? I would rather have quality time vs quantity. That’s not to say, you can’t help each other out, but I have no desire to have someone give their input on my living space, other mundane aspects of life. [/quote]

This is not usually how it works. You are looking for a unicorn. When people want a long term partner, it is usually the whole thing--living together and doing the mundane stuff. Most people do not want what you want.

I do, but I am divorced (and a woman and I have kids). If I did not have kids though, I would want the traditional LT (living together but not marriage).

You just have to accept you are probably not going to get what you want. If you do not want what goes into an LT, you are probably off the table for most people. You will have to settle for a series of longish-term hookups but not an actual LT relationship.

You may have more luck with divorced men who never want to marry again.[/quote]

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