Reply to Trying to convince husband to have a third baby

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Trying to convince husband to have a third baby"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was about to say to be prepared to offer to do the heavy lifting on #3 but someone upthread said that's a bad idea
[/quote]

I said that, because it’s really unreasonable. Parenting IS the heavy lifting.

What happens if she promises to do all the work for #3 and after she gets pregnant she’s put on bed rest? Guess who’s doing all the heavy lifting—the DH. And suppose everything goes well and she has a healthy pregnancy and a healthy newborn. Is it never going to be his turn to wake up in the middle of the night with the baby? Postpartum mothers need support and having a mom never get a break because “she promised to do all the work” is a recipe for postpartum depression.

And here’s the worst part: This type of arrangement destroys the bond between the dad and baby. Taking care of a newborn is a lot of work BUT it’s in the small moments of holding a baby, feeding them and taking care of them that the parental bond is built and strengthened. Setting the expectation that the mom does everything robs both dad and baby of that bond. It also harms the martial relationship. Sharing the experience of parenting makes it less stressful. Setting the expectation that one parent is exempt from the work of parenting is the same as saying they’re exempt from the joy of parenting. They’re 2 sides of the same coin. It’s a bad plan.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics