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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you were 35+ with your first child, when did you have a second child? What age gap worked for you? My husband and I have a 4-month-old. I’m 38          ( turning 39 in a couple of months) and he is 40. Our plan is to start trying for a second child when our first is a year old, but now I’m not sure if we should start trying sooner or wait longer. I know the ideal age gap is 3-4 years, but we can’t wait that long. I’m starting to worry that having a child 2 and under with a newborn will be very tough. I have a friend with a newborn and a 20 month old, and she said it’s very hard. What age do you think is he best time to start trying? [/quote]

This may sound scary, but if you want another: start now. Don't worry about the gap size; you'll get through it.

Had my son at 38 and after that -- nothing. He was, apparently my one and only good egg. Did all the things (including multiple rounds of IVF.) but he is the only one I'll have through my own body. Stopped trying at 43 and we are now approved & waiting to adopt an older child from foster care.

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