Reply to Therapist Won't Condemn my Partner's Affair.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry if I wasn't clear. My partner had an affair. I only discovered because I saw their texts. We decided to try counseling. Partner has yet to apologize or admit they were wrong.

On first visit, the therapist said they were not in a position to make judgement on whether the affair was wrong.

I need there to be an admission and recognition of wrongdoing in order to proceed toward forgiveness.

I was raised that you apologize when you're wrong.[/quote]

Op you sound very stubborn. You spouse sounds like he/she doesn’t think it was wrong, and the more you dig in the more justified they might feel. Why even bother with counseling? Your spouse clearly has no interest. [/quote]

What you are going through is extremely difficult, OP. I know I felt like I wanted the entire world to punish my ex for having an affair because it was so terrible to feel the way I felt, I was desperate to feel "better." But the truth is, even if your therapist scolded your DH, you won't feel better. You just think you will. And yes, it is not the therapists job to determine right and wrong because that's something you and your partner are supposed to do together with their help.

It sounds like this happened to you recently, so I hope you do continue to seek counseling, either as a couple or alone, because you need an outlet right now. I wish you luck. [/quote]

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