Reply to Is it reasonable to ask your parents what your inheritance expectations should be?

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[quote=Anonymous]We're dealing with two deaths in the past year - one on each side of our families.  Here are the important questions:
- Do you have a will and estate planning? Do you have funeral arranagements made?
- Have you named an executor (i.e. if it's you, then hopefully you'd know in advance)?
- Does someone know where all your files are, who your lawyer is, etc... to deal with these issues in the event you die or become incapacitated.
- Does someone know what plans are in place to care for disabled relative in the event you die or become incapacitated.

I would think it is absolutely inappropriate and crass to ask what money might be coming your way.  Presume $0, anything you do get is then "found money".  Broad brush of our current two circumstances -
- Family member that we thought didn't have much money ended up in nursing care for a year before dying.  Even after paying out of pocket for that for a year, turns out that between life insurance, remaining assets, sale of house and property, each of her 3 children is likely to inheirit close to six figures.  WAY  more than we ever would have imagined she had.
- Other family member quite wealthy.  Remarried a few years before his death to a much-younger woman who very quickly limited family access as his health declined.  A year before he died, convinced him to re-write his will leaving everything to her with her son as executor.  Children who might otherwise have each expected to receive 6-figure inheiritances instead received boxes of family photos and a few knick knacks.

Point being, even if your parents weren't completely appalled at your boorish behavior, you can count on nothing.  Ask the important business pieces of it, if you think you might be one of the folks involved in handling executor and probate-related duties.  Otherwise, love them while they're here as you'll miss them when they're gone no matter what is involved financially on the back end. [/quote]

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