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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom's narcissism and intense self focus has gotten worse. She's in her 80s and a widow and so people outside of the family give her a pass and fall for the helpless, little old lady narrative.

But as her DD, I can only take so much. She score keeps among her children;  who has most recently called, visited, helped her and the more extraordinary act of service, the better. Then she will call and tell me how my brother drove over to her house at sunrise, on the way to work, to fix something in her house and how she never sees me.

She has high expectations. Doesn't drive, but wants to be driven everywhere and taken on vacations or at least  invited along. I've posted on dcum before how I've flown and driven w my mom and she will not read, knit or otherwise occupy herself. Nope. She just talks, incessantly, about herself. [/quote]

Wow I relate to this except mine is late 70s. She milks up the whole widow thing, but she was an angry, resentful caregiver who we had to intervene with because she was becoming verbally abusive with both our father and the all the support staff. She totally tries to pull the "this sibling did this for me" or so and so's daughter does X,y, and z. I just end the conversation or leave. I don't try to refute or tell her to stop being manipulative because it sets off her tantrums. I just politely make an excuse to exit stage left.

She has evolved into a sometimes cruel, often needy, sometimes angry, often self-absorbed and difficult person. I wish she were in a state to be able to do volunteer work. She needs other things to obsess about.[/quote]

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