Reply to Help me with the mechanics of leaving my explosive/verbally abusive spouse

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Call the battered woman shelter.  They should also have
some suggestions for you.

Can you shove some one time bills (maybe heating) and
pay them out of the big account so you have move
discretionary money in the little account?  (Even if he
reacts strongly)

50% of all assets and debts are yours. Start buying the
25.00 visa gift cards so you have some extra cash on hand.

You have assets so you definitely need 1 legal consult
to find out best way to withdraw from the big account.
Lawyer may tell you to move out and withdraw half
of the big account same day but I'd have a lawyer tell
you that.

So you pay all of the day to day bills and husband
banks his paycheck in joint account which he thinks
is his.  Yea right. IT IS HALF YOURS AND DON'T TAKE LESS
THAN HALF.

Be aware the moving out part can be very volatile.
Husband sounds like a control freak.  Likely husband
will be unpredictable with divorce.  Due to husbands
volatility he may go for 50% custody. Also due to husbands
volatility what he thinks about the house is
unpredictable.

Any personal items that have sentimental meaning to 
you start removing from the house and store them
at your parents, a friends, or get a rental unit in your
name. It is doubtful he will miss the small stuff
being moved out.

Find out if the lawyers offer a free one time consult?
Your divorce will probably cost a lot in legal fees (due
to volatility) so make sure you ask each lawyer you interview what their legal fees are.

Anything breaks down in the meantime....frig,
washer and dryer, heater etc you spend money
out of the big account so you can keep pulling
money out of the small account.

How is your credit?  Do you have joint credit cards?
Do you have any old credit cards in your name
from pre marriage that are still active?  Find out
how much credit is on credit cards in your name only.

[/quote]

I have excellent credit and it's not problem to spend money on a consult. I'm not as poor as I may have led on. All the household charges, big bills get paid by credit card and he pays that bill each month. He's just super self centered.[/quote]

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