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[quote=Anonymous]ok, I'm going to offer something that might end up being helpful.

My uncle had a ranch, and he had a helper, Rick, on the ranch.  When our kids were young, my brother and I would bring our families to visit for a week or so.

I googled Rick one day and found out he was a convicted pedophile.  Shaking, I told my uncle and turned out my uncle already knew, and told me not to tell my brother (because he wanted the family visits to keep happening)

I was furious because this is something that I, as a parent, needed to know, so I can make decisions about if I want to put my kids in that environment.

My uncle's point was that he had everything taken care of so our kids would be safe, so there was no reason to tell us.

But that logic fails because you can't control for everything.  For instance, Rick has pedophile friends and one showed up on the property.  Or maybe Rick had cameras.  My uncle needed to tell me and let me decide.  And my brother.

I told my uncle that he could tell my brother or I would, because my brother also needed to know and make his own decisions about his kids.

So maybe OP is worked up because she's got little kids and she wants to be the one to decide whether to put them in this situation, rather than have her mom decide for her.  And she trusted her mom that her mom would not keep something like that from her.  So like my uncle, there is a lot of lying by omission and that is always shocking to discover.  And then there is a vulnerability...what else could she not be telling me?  Etc.

Meaning, OP is experiencing a breach of trust with her mom, and reacting to that, I think.[/quote]

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