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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]About three years ago, two things happened. My husband stopped drinking and started adderall. Since then, he has withdrawn from our marriage and seems to actively dislike me. He seems suspicious of me, always thinks the worst of me, doesn’t want to spend time with me or have anything to do with me, gets mad very quickly and yells says disrespectful things to me. Any ideas on how I could turn things around?
[/quote]

sounds like he has internalized his shortcomings (adderall is supposed to address the ADD/Aspie) and blaming you. why you? because he can hide them from most people at work, or out, but not at home nor on the weekends or on a vacation. 
he hates himself, however if he is at the blaming, deflecting, verbal abuse stage with loved ones, he also hates you. He is hyper defensive, not interested in changing, and you need to full disassociate and continue to live with him, or leave. [b]You can protect the children better with full custody than by staying[/b]. [/quote]

OP here. I disagree with this which is why I haven't left. He'll get at least half custody. I can't do that to them. I feel like I can protect them better the way things are now. Anyone have any ideas on turning things around in the marriage?[/quote]

PP here, sorry that I got off track. I meant to respond with, try the 180. Really, you can't control him or where your marriages goes from here. Focus on yourself first and the kids. I wish I would have done that sooner. While I did not consider leaving for the same reasons you mention, I spent years trying to get back a marriage that could not be revived.

You might have a chance of getting one back if you focus on yourself and your kids. Maybe he will see the light and want to come home.

Mine just backed into a corner more and more, and there is nothing to save at this point. Sometimes the medicine is worse than the cure. We honestly just wasted 20k on therapy bc he wasn't invested, and tons more on the other stuff. [/quote]

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