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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This has been going on for awhile.  We fear he’s now using daily possibly at school.  Friends use too but I have a feeling he’s the only one that uses a lot.  We find stuff, discuss, administer consequences and repeat.  He sees a therapist.  He’s on medication for anxiety and depression.  He’s on adhd medicine.  We have been ion top of and addressed /supported him with learning differences.   We are loving, present, supportive parents.  We’ve been told by therapist that treatment doesn’t work for marijuana.  90 plus percent return to it.

I know some will say he needs new friends.  Not sure how you can really force that at 16.  We could switch schools but he’d still see friends likely or make similar friends is my guess.  Same with boarding school where there typically are even more drugs.  We pay for private school , so taking that away is on the table I guess, especially as grades not great, effort low.  We can restrict /ban car, but pretty hard to ground a kid all the time.

I am interested in advice from parents who have dealt with similar.  Not parents who think they know what to do because believe me until you are living this you really don’t get it.  Thanks. [/quote]

I'm so sorry this is happening.

His current school does not sound like it is working for him. There are some amazing boarding schools out there. Not all of them make kids worse. On the other hand if he is getting at least C's & B's then graduating is top priority. Or his local school might be better.

I would not take his friends away. He will find them himself. Changing his school might make it harder to see them daily. Yes, he might seek out same type of kids or he might branch out to some other activities.

Car is a definite no as cars are a privilege, not a right. I wouldn't ground him just no car.

Of course no smoking at your house, house rules are for respect.

Does he have a part time job?

Because where is he getting the money to buy his stuff?

Sit him down ask what his long term plans are? College away from home. If so take him on some college tours. Yes, it's early but you are looking for a long term good goal. If not college is he planning on working if so where? Or Community college with a job again part time job important?.....

It's important to look forward and hopefully no progression to harder drugs.

No you are not a bad parent, this can happen with any one of our kids. IF anyone thinks otherwise think again.

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