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[quote=Anonymous]For a mantra, what about something funny that can help calm you down? If I were in your situation, something like "only five years left" might make me chill out a little, but obviously isn't for everyone. Think about something that can lend some humor to the situation.

As for the consequence you asked about, in this circumstance of running up the $101 lunch bill without permission, I would send her with a very basic, low-cost lunch every day until that debt is paid off. When she complains, you can calmly remind her that you've had to cut back on your grocery bill to pay off her debts so this is the natural consequence of that action. Something like peanut butter and jelly or cheese sandwiches (obviously you need to make sure her nutritional needs are being met over the course of the day, but you do NOT have to cater to her preferences; buy whatever is on sale to cut back). It's important to be calm though, not mean, when you say this. You could ask therapist to help you role-play you staying calm when your teen starts doing some of this stuff.

This seems to be beyond typical teens stuff and perhaps a second opinion of treatment options (including the boarding school option you mentioned) from a new therapist could be useful. I'm sorry your dealing with this, OP![/quote]

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