Reply to What will happen if we don't pay DC's tuition bill this semester?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DC cut off communication over the summer and went back to college in late August presumptuously assuming we'd still pay for everything for a person who has no respect or appreciation for us. We don't know if DC is enrolled or just idle in the college town. Is it possible to enroll in classes and not pay? Will DC just have a standing balance due, but be free to finish the semester? Because if that's the case, I guess DC can just carry this on until January free from any consequences.[/quote]

Dp. Ask yourself what you want you accomplish by not paying his tuition?  Do you think he will come to you to repair your relationship or will it further alienate him from you?  Do you want no contact?

I'm curious as to why you are not worried about the breakdown of your family?  I would go visit him and solve that first.  I can't believe you wouldn't want you son to get an education and also not be part of your life.[/quote]

It's our daughter. So a young adult can be [b]mean and rude to the entire family all summer[/b], not appreciate your sacrifices, deluded themselves into believing they're totally independent and don't need you, and expect zero consequences? Isn't that likely what stoked this? Her total confidence there would be no consequences. Or her confidence that she can ignore us all semester and then come home in December and play nice so we pay off the balance owed?[/quote]

What does this mean, in practice? Does this mean they wanted to make their own plans this summer, without you? That's what young adults generally want to do. If she was in college last year, did you bother to wonder whether something traumatic had happened there? Did you suggest therapy or counseling?

It would take a lot more than a summer of being nasty to me to make me stop paying for college, because unlike an immature young adult, I know that a college education is for life, and if I derail that, it will be incredibly damaging to my child. There are plenty of gainfully employed adults that now acknowledge being difficult when they were younger, and they are grateful their family didn't let them down. Who is the adult in this relationship? 
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