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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you so much for sharing, and hugs to all of you. I've never told anyone because I come from a 'good' background and have a stable and happy life, and I doubt anyone would believe me if I described even a fraction of what I went through.

I was thinking the other day about how almost everyone I interact with has no idea, and whether I would know if one of my friends had had similar experiences ('abuse-dar' for lack of a better term). One follow-up - do any of you who responded think you can sense when someone else has had similar experiences? I know I wonder when someone speaks coldly of their parents.

I worry about whether I'll be able to keep hiding it when my parents die (particularly my mother). I am bracing for the day I have to 'act' like a grieving daughter (with deep apologies for this comment to those of you who lost parents you loved and grieved them). [/quote]

OP, I read the last paragraph of this post and immediately thought of a piece I've bookmarked for myself for similar reasons. I find it super affirming, and it helps me keep my own needs in context when I start to think about guilt or what my relationship with my parents looks like from the outside. And like others have mentioned, I have found that (finally) talking to a therapist -- and there are many in DC who specialize in trauma and abuse -- has been much easier than I had dreaded, and has helped immensely. Sending you lots of warm vibes. [url]https://slate.com/human-interest/2013/02/abusive-parents-what-do-grown-children-owe-the-mothers-and-fathers-who-made-their-childhood-a-living-hell.html[/url][/quote]

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