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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]I feel like DS is terrorizing the household, and DH is helping him do it.  I was hoping for more constructive and helpful posts like this PP.  [/quote]

You are right in your assessment. But honestly, what can anyone offer if the other parent is going to undermine and has already rejected the notion that this is a problem. Thing is, unless your husband is going to change, which you seem to think he won’t, there are no solutions to your problem and it is only going to get worse. Sounds to me that the only thing you can do is figure out how to avoid conflict and how you will protect yourself if your son becomes violent towards you. If it were me I’d be putting money away so that I could move out if things escalate to that point. [/quote]

OP here.  I agree.  What I described is an acceptable way for DH and certain family members to act, so that is his normal (terrorizing each other to get what they want). For the PP's who stated that they can also be this way, is there anything (non-petulant and non-terrorizing) that could help for a harmonious situation across the board - not just for you?  How could we help to integrate DS into being a part of the family?  DS seems to think that something was "done" to him, but this is most certainly not the case.  His siblings love him, I feel DH is enabling him, and hot helping, but hurting (intentional or not). DH seems to have lots of anxiety and depression, and does not generally like seeing those close to him happy (not sure what that is called) and I want to help DS, because this must be part of the issue.  I am afraid that DH is trying to take DS down with him, frankly. Has anyone medicated a young teen?  What are the pros and cons?  I don't want to do this.  I want other answers.  I don't know how to get them.  Should I ask on another board or the SN forum? [/quote]

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