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[quote=Anonymous]I don’t think you every truly know. Would most people who used donor egg or donor embryos love if they had not needed ARTs at all? Sure. Do they love their kids a ton and is their world filled with joy (and all the trials of parenting) yes. Do most look down and see the person and the learned traits (he laughs like me, she crinkles her nose like her dad when she is thinking). Of course. Could there be a pang of - he does not have my nose? Sure. But many people here who have used donor embryos or adopted tell stories of people meeting them and pointing out some trait that is biological but that the kids have.

Unfortunately, this path sucks and there is no road map and a child is precious. So you can’t try it out and see how you would feel. What happens if you do two cycles  of donor egg and nothing sticks? Would that change the equation? (Not saying do that but imagine it. If then you would be open to donor embryos, then take this opportunity). If you would still be conflicted, don’t.

I know friends where the man felt like it was cheating on the wife to use donor eggs and was not comfortable with only his DNA being present. So they did not go that route.but you have to have the hard conversation about what you are comfortable with. [/quote]

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