Reply to s/p engagement rings: does this scenario make sense?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP back, appreciate these replies. For those wondering why I'm crowd-sourcing this, it's mostly out of curiosity. I'm confident in making my own choices, but it's always curious to read the typical DCUM vitriol/strong opinions about things like rings, weddings, etc. (see the thread where the OP doesn't like her ring and is fairly lambasted to "buy your own ring!!"). I've made some admittedly non-traditional choices, but some traditional milestones are important to me, regardless of our age or my particular path.

The route I took with my job, financial independence, and parenting, had largely to do with my own upbringing. I mentioned I'm from a successful blended family...now. But the the creation of that family involved a fairly traumatic divorce. Everyone's grown and (I really believe) pretty healthy now, but as a young woman the message I got was that marriage was an unsafe place for women. I vowed never to depend on a man for money or security.

Now that I'm older and more mature, I still don't need a man for those purposes, but I want a partner and I want to model a healthy relationship for my DD. I'm a good parent but frankly she needs more than just me. This man is a good one. I trust him and believe in his ethics and his intent. Plus he makes me laugh and really, really loves me.

I don't want to forgo some of the traditional things I want to do (i.e. an engagement ring) but we are both saving for college for our daughters, our retirement, etc, and we're not in our 20's. Anyway appreciate the responses.[/quote]

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