Reply to Help! DD14 does not want to come with us on family trip

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Who are all of these people who think that the parent-child relationship consists of parents giving orders and children obeying? For 14-year-olds?[/quote]

People who live in houses run by adults and not children?

This isn't a petty dictatorship issue where OP is insisting a teenager wear a certain sweater for the family photo; the kid is too young to stay home without adult supervision for 4 days, and it's a sign that something has gone really wrong in OP's parenting that she thinks she has the option to make the demand (and that OP thinks she can't simply veto it).  [/quote]

It isn't, but you're making it one. The 14-year-old would stay home with her 19-year-old sister, so that's not staying home alone. And OP hasn't said WHY the 14-year-old is refusing to go on an 8-hour trip. If you think the reason is irrelevant because the 14-year-old has to obey or else, regardless, then yes, it's a petty dictatorship.[/quote]

OP said she doesn't want to share a room with her cousin and she just wants to be alone.  Also that the 19 year old will be [u]working[/u].  So no, nothing you've written applies.  The kid won't be supervised, she doesn't have a good reason, and she's still a child.  Spending the holidays with your family and not unsupervised at home alone is not a petty dictatorship issue.  It's basic parenting to, y'know, parent your kids and not leave them alone for close to a week because they're in a bad mood.

Add on that OP says her DD is depressed and you're looking at a potentially dangerous situation, not just a case of bad parenting judgment.[/quote]

You have a good point.  This is why I may cancel the trip.  [/quote]

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