Reply to Explain to me “my most authentic self”

Forum Index » LGBTQIA+ Issues and Relationship Discussion

Reply to "Explain to me “my most authentic self”"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I can say that I don’t know what it “feels like” to be someone else and also believe that same someone else holds a mistaken belief. Those aren’t contradictory. I don’t know what it “feels like” to grow up believing the earth is flat, but I can still say that it’s a mistaken belief.

I think you’re missing the point though. When you say you “feel feminine,” you’re saying you feel something that you choose to label “feminine,” and perhaps you describe your feeling to a dozen other women and most of them nod and say “the way I feel sounds similar to the way you say you feel. And I too label that ‘feminine.’” Nothing wrong with that— but have you and your hypothetical confidants exhausted the possible ways women can feel? Surely not. Surely there are other women who feel differently, or don’t label how they feel “feminine,” or use that label to mean something quite different.

Again, this has nothing to do with rights or supporting or not supporting transgender people and the choices they make (and yes, I am close to several trans people). I can believe that they should wear any clothes they want, have any medical treatment they want, use whatever pronouns they want, and present in any way they want, from stereotypically feminine to stereotypically masculine, and that no one shou,d bug them about it or discriminate against them based on it— and I can still say, however, that if they announce that they “feel male” or “feel female,” that is a statement about themselves and their views of how they would prefer to act and look and be treated, not a statement about femaleness or maleness.

Here’s a thought experiment: do you feel the same about gender and race? If not, why not? Consider Rachel Dalziel, a white woman who insisted that she “felt” black and wanted others to treat her as black. Many African Americans were understandably a bit put out that she was insisted that she had some special insight into what it “feels like” to be black. 
If you are white and announced to me that you “feel” Latina, I’d be equally irritated: if you like the individual and cultural attributes you associate with being Latina, that’s great, and if you want to learn Spanish, cook and eat Latin cuisines (it’s yummy, you’re welcome), wear Latina clothing styles and so on, go for it. I don’t own Latina culture. But telling me that “deep inside” your “authentic self” is Latina is self-indulgent and arrogant. You don’t and can’t know what it “feels like.”[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics