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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not sure you can affect this. It needs to come from her. I started playing soccer at 6 and never felt like this. One big difference, however, is that from 6-10, I played mostly with boys (not much girls soccer back then). I joined a girls travel team two towns over when I hit puberty. Why don't you try having her play with boys (pickup, informally, etc) and see if any natural competitiveness and aggression comes forth....then you can see if it's in her...[/quote]

Yes she does play pickup with boys and this doesn’t happen, even older boys she plays hard,  only happens with girls she knows/cares about.[/quote]

I think you answered the question right there. You say she "cares about" the girls from whom she doesn't want to steal any glory. This is about the social assimilation / acceptance / validation that even some stoic-seeming girls tend to want at that age.

Is she, perchance, one of the youngest on the team? Possibly in a lower grade at school than some of the others? If so, consider that upsetting the social structure could, in her mind, feel like social suicide.

And she would be right --- but almost invariably, this would be the case with less secure and less talented players. They want her to know he place so that they don't lose ground within the team hierarchy.[/quote]

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