Reply to I don't know anyone else going through secondary infertility

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[quote=Anonymous]Hi OP,

I'm going through secondary infertility. At 33 I conceived my DD after 4 months of trying - then discovered I had a pre-mutatiion for fragile X and then had a CVS test around 11 weeks. Waited for about a month for those results and everything turned out fine. That pregnancy was uneventful and easy except for the psychological torture of waiting on the CVS test results. I never thought I wanted more than one kid and honestly for the first 2 years of DD's life I was all consumed with just her and then I became consumed with having just 1 more.

At 36 after 6 months of trying I went to an RE and had all the prerequisites to begin IVF. After several months of consideration and continued efforts trying to conceive naturally I opted for multi cycle with PGD/PGS testing. It took almost a full year to convince my husband of the financial commitment and for the perfect timing in our lives. I went through one 1 round of IVf and the FET with PGD/PGS normal embryo and it failed. I thought something was wrong with me and like you I saw families all around me expanding - it was very rare to see an only.  I even went so far as to tell my DD I couldn't have another baby - trying to manage her (and my) expectations. There were very hard days but I took solace in knowing I had at least 1 healthy child.  Even though I was depressed , I took comfort in that especially knowing so many women out there were struggling for their one DC. I felt very grateful but still depressed. I thought about therapy but ultimately this online support group helped the most.  Reading so many stories of what women are going through reminded me I wasn't alone and again I should be grateful for what I have.   After taking a few months off of before 2nd round of IVF I was ready to try again. So I went through another round (retrieval, testing, transfer, etc) and at 38 just got a BFP. It is so early that it's not real and honestly way too early to get excited but it is a glimmer of hope. My advice - you will know when you are done trying but until then keep fighting and doing everything you can.  There are so many women out there going through what you are or even harder scenarios and most importantly hug the one DC you have with all your might. Whatever happens at least you will know you tried.  Wishing you all the best.[/quote]

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