Reply to What possesses a woman to go after every guy you are interested in?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm 52 and now long married, but I had to deal with this problem more than once in my single life until I figured the following out:

Your "friend" is not your friend, she is your frienemy.  The reason is that she is competing with you, and true friends don't compete with each other, they support each other.  This means for men, academics, career, when your car breaks down, you name it.

This is what I've told my kids so they will be able to both choose good friends, and be good friends to others.

To find a true friend, you have to wait a while.  You have to wait until something *good* happens to you, or something *bad* happens to you.

When something good happens to you, who is cheering and shouting congratulations from the rooftops?  Who is annoyed or jealous?  And who has suddenly disappeared?

When something bad happens to you, who is helping you get through it?  Who is quietly smirking (schadenfreude).  And who has suddenly disappeared?

When you find the true friend, invest more time in them--and be their true friend back.  And when you find our someone is really your frienemy, just distance yourself, put them back at acquaintance level. Don't waste your time with frienemies because life is too short.  And don't tell them things--meaning, don't *trust* them, as they will exploit your trust.  So, for example, don't tell them you like that guy.[/quote]

Excellent post.

Signed, a man.  [/quote]

+1
I am sending it to my daughter.

Signed, 50+ years old mom. [/quote]

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